We do not write because we want to; we write because we have to.” - W. Somerset Maugham.

Are you one of those angst-ridden writers who scribbles in a frenzy with a wild eyed look on any scrap of paper he can find, with nothing but nothing penetrating that concentration- not hunger, not tiredness- save perhaps for death itself?!

No, neither am I actually. Give me a coffee and a donut any day and then maybe I’ll think about putting pen to paper. I’m lazy. Once I’ve got my big slippers on and my comfy trousers, of course. Such a glamorous thing it is to be a writer of sorts!

Writing. Some people say that to be a successful writer in any shape or form, you need to be dedicated 24/7 to your creativity. I write for the pleasure of writing, and if someone wants to fork out some cash to use my ramblings, far be it for me to say no! I like the feel-good feeling that it gives me to write, plain and simple. Contributions towards those double dipped Krispy Kremes are a pleasant bonus, but not required.

There really are some very intense, fascinating writers out there that are far more serious about their craft than I am. I have every respect for them. Those who show such focused dedication are undoubtedly more worthy of success and admiration than any comparatively half baked efforts that I make, that’s for sure. But then I’m lazy, truth be told, when it comes to my writing.

People ask me why I do it. I tell them it’s for the adulation that I get. Honestly, the look in my dog’s eyes when I read to her would bring a tear to a glass eye.

You see, not everyone writes for profit or recognition or a desire to achieve some kind of celebrity status. Some of us write because we just like to do it and the way that creating something unique makes us feel. Others write because they simply use that as an outlet of self expression that comes easier than the spoken word. Some do so simply to try pick up a little extra cash along the way or a combination of all of the above. There’s room for us all. For now though, the focus here is on part time writers and scribblers like myself that need the occasional bit of a push to fit it in and would like to develop a little more while enjoying the process.

What can we dabblers do then to help us along the way, I hear you ask? Here’s where this lazy person’s guide comes into its own. I’m going to write this in installments when the mood strikes. Anything I think you would find helpful will be shared with you. If there’s an easy way to do something writing related that I know of, I’ll tell you.

What’s expressed here will be my own personal opinion about the good, the bad and the ugly when it comes to writing. Oscar Wilde said, “One can give a really unbiased opinion only about things that do not interest one”. I hope you can tell that I’m interested!

As Julie Andrews once sang…

Let’s start at the very beginning. First off, decide what you want to do with your writing. Would you like to see it published? Would you want to share it with anyone and everyone, a select few or keep it private? Could you cope with the rejection when publications say no to what you consider to be your best work and worse still, criticize it? (Hint…if not, keep it in the drawer because that’s highly likely to happen. Almost everyone gets rejected at some point.)

If it does, step away from the keyboard and breathe before doing something nuts like dashing off an angry rebuttal to the editor, for goodness sake! It’s best to take time out and sleep on these things for about oh, a decade, before responding. You may just have cooled down enough by then.

Seriously, it’s not the end of the world if you are rejected. Just move on, take on board what’s said if you think it’s valid, revise it then send it to another editor elsewhere. Criticism can be both constructive and destructive, depending on how you look at it and the manner in which it’s delivered. That’s another subject for another day there.

So, would you prefer to aim solely for publication or do you want to just write for the fun of it and be happy with that? That’s good too and we can still share a couple of ideas about some playful and useful resources for writers.

Let’s assume for the purposes of this yarn though that you want to find a middle ground. You’d like to still enjoy and improve your writing without it becoming like work (unless that’s your job!) but at the same time you think it’d be nice seeing your name in print so you’re not completely averse to submissions either.

To submit or not to submit, that is the question.

Once you start getting sucked into the tornadic world of submission guidelines, publishers and editors, there’s a whole new realm out there to discover. Now if like me, you’re a lazy writer, then you can lose yourself for hours, days even, in the researching of the markets and end up doing very little actual writing indeed.

Lucky for us there’s a few fantastic websites out there like Winning Writers and the forums at Absolute Write. They have a phenomenal amount of good solid trustworthy information that you can draw upon which includes amongst other things, who’s looking for submissions. (I am a fan of both but just as a lowly member, just in case you’re wondering. No affiliation there.)

One of the first things that the lazy writer needs to do is to bookmark these stupendously good sites and ones of similar caliber. These two in particular are useful in that they keep you up to date with what’s going on in the writing world and are also useful as a reference point for checking out any scams before submitting your work anywhere.

The scam check is one area that you really can’t be lazy about. These sites list scam warnings out of the goodness of their hearts to prevent any fellow writers being taken advantage of and it certainly appears that they are all thoroughly checked out by the site’s staff prior to their addition to the lists.

A quick aside on submission guidelines:

Please follow them. Don’t think that they apply to everyone except you. Unless you want your work to be trash fodder from the moment the envelope is opened, simply do what you’re asked to. A statement of “online submissions only” does not mean that you can post it by snail mail or vice versa.

If you’re unclear on what they’re meaning, simply email the publishers and politely ask. If you’re too chicken to approach them, alternatively you could post the guidelines on a writer’s forum and ask for some guidance from more experienced members. Don’t guess, because you’ll just waste everyone’s time, including your own and it will do nothing to endear you to the publisher.

One more small suggestion. If you’re submitting articles online, double check someone can contact you to ask about using them easily. When I was editing our online magazine, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to pass up great articles. The reason? Purely because there was no way to get in touch, either through the author’s profile or no “Contact Us” link at their website.

When pushed for time, it makes all the difference if it’s in plain sight, so do yourself a favor and check. It’d be a real shame if all your hard work would be passed by for something that’s simply fixed by a quick edit of your profile or website.

Time out

Here’s a thought: maybe you should put down the coffee and go write something now. One of the best ways to have fun with your writing (assuming that you still want that too and haven’t gotten all serious on me!) is to just sit down and write. Anything at all. Seriously. Words, phrases, even whole sentences or paragraphs - doesn’t matter, as long as you’re writing. If you have writer’s block, start there and write about you having writer’s block and see where that takes you.

No one’s looking over your shoulder reading it, so if you want to go off at a tangent then do it! How about that for a simple but obvious tip. You’ll be surprised what can spring forth from such small beginnings though and you need only do it for as long as it holds your interest. Grab a big spiral notepad and go for it. Go ahead, I’ll wait…

Moving on swiftly then! Studies show that those of us of a sloth-like nature are usually huge fans of writer’s tools. Much as we’d like to write something fabulous, sometimes we need a kick start to get us revved up.

(When I say “studies show”, I mean that I looked at myself in the mirror and asked the question, but that could be seen by some uncharitable folks as just plain sad, so instead I just say “studies show”. It sounds more professional.)

Cool Tools

My next favorite thing to Krispy Kremes are writing related resources and if they’re useful too, so much the better. I’ll be sharing some with you here over the coming months once I get up the nerve to sift through my huge Favorites list. There is a world chock full of free writer’s tools out there and again some outstanding sites for those moments when you hit a blank.

Amongst my personal favorites is Seventh Sanctum, which is packed wall to wall with generators for everything from a corporation name to super villain themes.

Need a quick character? Then hit the button on that generator and see what comes up. (I got “the attractive cleric who has an odd way of speaking” in the General category.) Want to fill out his background a little? Try the Academic Realm generator for some authentic sounding skills, such as a degree in Theological Experimentation- sounds like it’d be something a futuristic cleric would do to me.

So within the space of a minute, we have the embryonic stages of an interesting character to work with or my name’s not Ludisiax Chaosfang. (Ok, it’s not but I couldn’t resist trying the Dark Elf Name one.) Seventh Sanctum truly is a joy to visit, a lot of fun and always has something fresh and interesting to discover no matter how often you return. Trouble is, you can get so immersed in it, you get nothing done! That’s a compliment to what is truly a procrastinator’s paradise.

Seventh Sanctum really can blow the cobwebs off your creativity and deserves a big thumbs up for this springboard’s ability to get you out of the starting blocks.

So that should be plenty to get you going! I hope there’s been a few helpful hints in there you can use until next time. The main thing about writing is, enjoy it.

Visit Kay at her blog, Hill Holler, for more writing tips, competitions and ramblings.